‘I thought: a donor organ is for sick people, right?’

Jelger (33) has a busy job, is happily married, and is the father of a newborn son and a 1.5-year-old. A while ago, he couldn't have imagined such a life. ‘In 2012, I was leading a nice student life and had a sweet girlfriend. I had a part-time job as a hospitality manager. One evening while working a bar shift, I had a stomach ache. I kept going on paracetamol and Red Bull, but the next day it hadn't gone away. At the emergency clinic in the hospital, they took an X-ray and saw something in my liver. I had to stay immediately. After many tests, it turned out to be cancer. My life changed completely in an instant.’

Only a transplant was life-saving

After several surgeries, the cancer kept coming back, Jelger says. ‘Chemo was at most life-extending. Only a transplant would be life-saving. I was registered as a donor myself. When making that decision, I hadn't thought that something could happen to me. When I heard I had to receive a donor liver, I thought: that’s for sick people, isn't it? I had ended up in a totally surreal situation.’

Tears down our cheeks

In 2014, Jelger was screened for a donor liver and was called in early 2015. ‘I hadn't expected it to go so fast, but I had deteriorated rapidly. On the way to the hospital for the transplant, my girlfriend and I played loud music. Tears streamed down our cheeks; it was so emotional.’

Three times a new liver

The transplant went wrong. Due to a kink in a blood vessel behind the liver, the organ began to die. Jelger was placed on the international emergency list. ‘I barely experienced that myself; I only know fragments. For my girlfriend, it was terrible.’ Soon, a liver arrived from abroad, but that transplant also went wrong. ‘My body rejected the liver. In 2015, things were very bad. I was as yellow as a Minion and completely swollen. But in October, I was lucky: I received a third liver.’

From surviving to living

‘My wife and I are survivors; I never doubted that things would turn out okay,’ says Jelger. ‘After the third liver, it did get harder. That was when I made the step from surviving to living. It was nerve-wracking when the hospital check-ups stopped and I got my life back. A bit of fear has remained. If I get a stitch in my side, I think: wait. But I am living again.’

Jelger's girlfriend is now his wife. ‘She is the strength I could build on. She had it harder than I did, because I was in a dark place. We now have two sons, wonderful! If I see photos now of when I was more dead than alive in a hospital bed, I think: there is no greater contrast.’

Taking nothing for granted

Jelger experiences happiness intensely. ‘After the third transplant, I stood outside in the sun in my wheelchair, together with my wife. One of the best moments of my life. I also find the daily grind helpful. We can have a routine again, think: what are we eating? It helps me put things into perspective. At the same time, I take nothing for granted. If our oldest son doesn't want to sleep, I realize: I am able to be annoyed by this. Fantastic.’

I commemorate my three donors annually

‘On the day of my third transplant, I reflect on the ultimate gift from my three donors. We were cheering when a liver arrived, but others were crying. I realize that very well. But without them, I wouldn't be here anymore.’